Category Archives: Forum

15 ways to survive college

by Melanie Parrish

In light of the multitude of recent school shootings, many people are wondering how they can keep themselves safe in college. While you can not exactly stop a crazed gunman from bursting into your classroom, there are plenty of fairly basic things that you can do to keep yourself and your friends out of potentially dangerous situations. After asking several college students and graduates, I came up with a list of the top 15 things that you can do:

  1. Stay alert. Keep your head up and know what is going on around you. Do not walk around completely absorbed in your phone or iPod.

  2. Know your limits. If you find yourself in a situation that feels unsafe or makes you uncomfortable, do not hang around.

  3. Do not let strangers into the dorm. If your door does not have a peephole, consider getting one installed.

  4. Be indoors when you are supposed to be. Do not go sneaking out at two in the morning. If you have to sneak around, that’s typically a sign that you should not be doing it (unless it is April Fool’s Day. Then it’s just fun).

  5. Let a friend or roommate know where you’re going to be and when you expect to return if you are going out. Do not, however, post notes on your door, on their car, or in other public places.

  6. There is safety in numbers. Everyone has heard this before, but it’s true. You have a smaller chance of something happening to you if you are surrounded by friends than if you are alone.

  7. Stay sober, or have a designated driver and be aware of how much you are drinking. And hey, make sure you are 21 first.

  8. Watch your stuff. Don’t run the risk of taking a bathroom break and returning to find your phone or laptop gone.

  9. Lock the door and windows of your dorm room at night. Don’t prop open doors or put tape over locks.

  10. Choose your school wisely. A school with a reputation as a “party school” is likely to have more problems than a quiet campus will.

  11. Know how to defend yourself. Consider taking a self-defense course. If you don’t have the time for this, carry pepper spray or something similar. There are also products that combine the spray with an air horn. Don’t feel silly or paranoid for carrying it! Check to make sure that it is allowed on your campus first.

  12. Know what safety offerings your school has. If there is an emergency notification system (email/text alerts), use it! Some schools will also have an escort system or shuttles if you need to get home late.

  13. Put all emergency numbers in your phone.

  14. Stay in areas with a lot of people. A crime is less likely to happen in an area with a bunch of people around.

  15. Have enough money for a taxi and a phone call if needed. Don’t end up stranded somewhere. Keep your cell phone charged.

So there you have it. 15 pretty simple ways to take precautions against dangerous situations. Most of these won’t even involve a significant change in your day-to-day life, so there’s really not much reason not to do them! Like I said: you can’t stop some things from happening, but you can do something to prepare for if it does.

Popularity issues plague teens

by Sydney Sears

As a fifth grade girl it was all I had ever wanted. The illusion of popularity basked in my vision, taunting me. I moved here when I was 11 and my ultimate goal was to be popular. I had no desire to be the awkward new kid with no friends and her head hanging low. I wanted popularity and I was willing to change myself to do so. I started to obsess over what I wore. I was constantly worrying about my appearance. I even started hanging out with people who were not the best influence for me. None of these changes made me happier or a better person, yet that was the price I was willing to pay for a taste of the popular life.

 

Popularity is this misconfigured concept that teenagers are taught to believe is something important. Movies, books, and media seem to show us that being in the “popular crowd” is essential and one of the most successful things one can accomplish in high school. This could not be farther from the truth.

 

These days being popular seems to consist of partying, defying parents, and not caring what happens. This is not always the case, but it is what society has generalized popularity to be. This should not be something that anyone strives for. Teens are made to feel inferior if this is not their lifestyle. Since when has getting good grades and following rules made someone unsuitable to a social crowd? That should not be the case. Succeeding in things are reasons someone should be looked up to, not because of how little they studied for their semester final or how much they partied the previous weekend. Doing something different and just being oneself is radical in today’s society since everyone wants to do the same thing in order to look or act cool. Teens should not sacrifice their personality, and especially not their dignity to be accepted into a place that they may not truly want to be.

 

Eventually my preteen-self learned that how popular one is in school does not matter at all in the grand scheme of life. I began to change back to my former self and renewed my former personality that did not care if I was wearing a t-shirt or if my hair was a little messy. I learned to love myself for who I was and not who I hung out with. My friends liked me regardless of the sport I played or how well-dressed I was. I was miserable throughout the process of trying to please everyone, including myself. Once I learned that popularity does not define someone I was happy and confident, which is what really matters.

Columnist discusses introverted characteristics

By Brooke McAfee

I am an introvert. I do not feel compelled spend my free time in the constant company of other people, but the idea of spending a few hours in solitude, reading a book or listening to music, seems to be the perfect way to unwind after a stressful week. Time spent among a crowd, exchanging mindless small talk with unfamiliar people, may seem to drag on and on for hours, but hours spent engaging in meaningful conversation among close friends cannot be wasted. And I do not see the need to fill every silent moment with my voice.

It is not that I am shy or antisocial. Introversion is simply a different way of thinking.

The main difference between an introvert and an extrovert is the way they become energized. An extrovert will find energy by exposure to people and social situations, while introverts recharge by being alone with their thoughts for a while.

Introversion is a commonly misinterpreted personality trait. Though the majority of people tend to have extroverted personalities, introverts are not abnormal whatsoever. It is ridiculous to stereotype us, because we rarely fit perfectly into a category.

We can be quite social, talkative, and vivacious, contrary to the common opinion. And just because we do not want to be around certain people all the time is not a sign of dislike. It is simply difficult for us to have prolonged exposure to socialization. To us, solitude does not have to be synonymous with the terms bored or lonely. It can be easier to feel bored or lonely in a massive crowd of people we do not feel a true connection with.

Many introverts participate in social situations with ease, and we are certainly capable of enjoying the company of people we find interesting. We can even tolerate the sort of dull, meaningless chit chat we find so excruciating, because silence is often perceived as rude or awkward, and a conversation about things that actually matter can be difficult to initiate. And around friends or family, we may be among the loudest and most talkative in the room.

But at the end of the day, we need to be alone with our thoughts, away from the chaos of the external world. Because, let’s face it, people can be exhausting.

There are many ups and downs to being an introvert. We prefer listening to frequent speaking, and we are less likely to act impulsively, preferring to thoughts before action. We can easily concentrate, especially upon matters we are passionate about.

However, with such a personality, there are many complications. We often keep our thoughts locked up inside of us, which can make it quite difficult for people to truly get to know us. Our minds and imagination might be overactive with tumultuous activity, but little escapes from the brain into speech. That’s why many introverts turn to writing as a means of expression.

Perhaps, to the extroverted mind, what I have described seems like complete misery. Yet many people simply do not understand how introverts work. We cannot change who we are: our introversion is lodged deep within our psychology. And that is fine. Sometimes, all I need is the people I care about, meaningful conversation, and some peace and quiet.

Columnist reflects on selfishness and selflessness

By Blake Dykes

“Blake, you’re so selfish; all you care about is yourself and what Blake wants.”

I was hearing that often from my mother. I didn’t have time to hang out with family, help clean or run errands, I was too busy with working out, softball, and school.  I mean, that was way more important anyway. I had lived with this mindset for the past two years, until one day I came to the realization that I was one of the most self absorbed people I knew.

On Feb. 9, 2013 my parents got a call from my dad’s sister. She told us that my grandpa (my dad’s dad) was having difficulty breathing and was being taken to the hospital, although at the time no one knew how serious his conditions were.

Of course, my parents were going to the hospital, Baptist East, to make sure he was going to be okay. My mom wanted both my brother and me to go, but I said no and that I already had plans to watch the girls’ basketball sectional game against New Albany.

We had no idea of the severity of his conditions, but I had an unsettling feeling that I was making the worst choice of my life. My grandpa never got sick, and for him to even go to the hospital meant that something was seriously wrong.

The game was not enjoyable at all. The entire time I had a suffocating guilt on my chest. I just had the notion that something was terribly wrong. During the game I got a call from my mom saying that my grandpa was doing awful and that I needed to head home to be with my younger brother. Once I was home I started receiving updates about my grandpa’s health, until the last one that said that he was unconscious.

My parents didn’t come home until 4 in the morning, and he died that Sunday, two hours later, at 6. The man who came to every one of my softball games, the man who took his sick elderly neighbor to breakfast on the weekends, the man that didn’t know a stranger,the man who took care of his wife with cancer, was gone.  The community’s selfless  hero had died.

I didn’t get to tell him that I admired him for all of those characteristics because I was too busy with my own life.

His death was very unexpected, considering that he was only 63. Later, though, we found out that he had lung cancer, and had known about it for his last few years on earth. Yet he chose to keep it to himself because he didn’t want the people he loved worrying about him

I guess that’s the difference between selfless and selfish people; selfless people will go to extremes to make others happy, despite their own needs and wants, while selfish people are only concerned with themselves.

#SPEAKOUT: Columnists shares lessons learned from sibling

By Danielle Sheally

There comes a time in everyone’s life when a best friend or sibling backs down their driveway to start the next chapter in the journey of life and, until they’re gone we don’t realize how much they really affected our lives. My brother Willie always connected with people well. He was the person that automatically made a awkward situation feel totally comfortable and, for the class of 2013 he was definitely one of the most recognized people.

As I look back on our time together, two things my brother taught me that are imporant are: stay confident in any situation, and always form some kind of relationship with the people in our lives.

For me, staying confident in certain situations helps me rationalize with the issue at hand. For example, if I have to do the project that involves public speaking I always try to get interested in some aspect of the topic. That way the project is easier to talk about. If it something I’m really not interested in though I always try to crack a couple jokes related to the topic so it allows the crowd and I to become more relaxed.

Forming relationships with teachers and colleagues is something that I always try to do, because it may come to help when I least expect it. The relationship also help me know what kind of personality my teacher of friend has so, if I want say something I know whether to refrain from saying it or not. It’s always good to have if you just want to blow off steam.

 

So, my brother may not realize it right now but, he’s actually really helped me in my life.